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08 September 2010 @ 11:59 pm
Film at 11: No Velociraptors  

Restaurant Says "NO" to Screaming Children

Excerpt the First:
A restaurant in Carolina Beach is stirring up controversy over a couple of signs reading, "Screaming children will not be tolerated."

Excerpt the Second:
"I've never seen a restaurant say, don't bring your screaming kids in here," said Ashley Heflin, who is a mom of two. "You can't help it if your kids scream."


You can either pay attention to them -- and that includes "discipline", if need be -- or you can stay the BLEEP home and take care of them.

You can even find a baby sitter, if you just need some out-of-the-house time and a break from parenting.

When I first reacted to this story, hoodahdc said, "Athe is angry about babies."

No, Athe is angry about parents.

Nine times out of ten, when I see some kid screaming its head off in a restaurant or a mall or in my BLEEPing store, the parents are blithely ignoring it and doing their damnedest to hold a conversation over their progeny's howls.

I would, for the record, consider the stereotypical parental brush-off of "not now, dear, Mommy's talking" that is media shorthand for "parental neglect" vastly superior to the parents I see who flat-out ignore their offspring.

So yes. YES. Hooray for Brenda Armes, and I hope beyond hope that she's the harbinger of a trend.
Araquan Skytraceraraquan on September 9th, 2010 07:14 am (UTC)
This. Yes, this.
Reveille D'Giovanettireveille_d on September 9th, 2010 07:25 am (UTC)
I'm not a parent of human children, so I don't know, but doesn't giving them the attention they're screaming for encourage them to scream anytime they want attention? Or are you saying that if they paid attention in the first place, they wouldn't scream?
Your Obedient Serpent: tell it like it ISathelind on September 9th, 2010 07:34 am (UTC)
"You need to be quiet now" counts as "attention".

So does, "we are going home right now if you keep that up."

And, while it may have fallen out of favor, so does **SMACK!!**

Any of these options count as better parenting than simply ignoring your caterwauling crotch dropping and the effect they have on the people around you.

I'd like to apply that last one to whatever genius came up with "just let them scream and scream and scream and scream, because paying attention just gives them what they want."

It doesn't work.

Clarifying abit:

Human children are hardwired to want attention -- acknowledgement -- from the adults in their lives. Providing that attention and acknowledgement is the appropriate role of the parent, and part of that attention is, in fact, notifying your children when their behavior has stepped outside the bounds of what is appropriate. If you do not acknowledge them when they scream, you are a) condoning public screaming as appropriate behavior and b) encouraging them to scream even more loudly in an attempt to wring some affection out of Wire Mother.

Edited at 2010-09-09 07:38 am (UTC)
Grauph. - velvetpage on September 9th, 2010 10:35 am (UTC) (Expand)
When a child misbehaves, smack the parents. - athelind on September 9th, 2010 04:47 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Eclipseeclipsegryph on September 9th, 2010 12:37 pm (UTC)
Now they just need to add this to airlines. :p
Moonfire: amusedmoonfires on September 9th, 2010 04:00 pm (UTC)
Babies go in cargo with the pets. :D
Grauph. - hafoc on September 10th, 2010 02:29 am (UTC) (Expand)
Grauph. - athelind on September 9th, 2010 04:03 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Grauph. - araquan on September 9th, 2010 05:35 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Grauph. - tombfyre on September 9th, 2010 05:39 pm (UTC) (Expand)
M.W.Wonkasvashtar on September 9th, 2010 01:55 pm (UTC)
When I acted up in public, my parents would drag me outside, sit me on the cement, and tell me, "When you can behave, we'll go back inside."

Abuse? Hardly. I'm stubborn. Always have been. My parents missed a few meals because I'd sit on the ground and sulk. But the point is, they would *do* something about my behavior, rather than allow me to scream in a restaurant or movie theater.

When you sulk long enough, you get bored.
John "The Gneech" Robeythe_gneech on September 9th, 2010 02:11 pm (UTC)
Reminds me of the coffee shop that posted a sign, "Unattended children will be given free coffee and a puppy."

-The Gneech
Ursula Messerschmitt: Parenting-Unattended Children-Puppysnobahr on September 9th, 2010 03:43 pm (UTC)
Gneech - please see userpic :)
My parents were also of the "take the troublesome child outside and Have Words" school of thought. When my boy starts acting up, we stop what we're doing, I kneel so I'm at his eye level, and state quietly, emphatically, that his behaviour is unacceptable and guarantees that he's not going to get [item he's having a tantrum over]. This threat is most effective when we're at Disneyland, because being able to say "I'll take you home and let Nana (his grandmother) watch you for the rest of the day, and I'll come back here and have fun without you" is hardly empty at all - we live 30 miles from the park and I have free parking.

I love my son immensely, and I will not see him turn into a self-absorbed, self-entitled git with no clue on how to behave in public. I loathe children who can't behave in a restaurant, and I absolutely detest the parents which allow that behaviour to continue unchecked.

Kymrikymri on September 9th, 2010 03:06 pm (UTC)
Bad parenting is rampant and it's most visible sign (right now) is this sort of behavior. Other visible signs will be observable as these kids grow up. Some of it is already observable in the parents who are letting their kids run rampant. Two generations of 'benign' neglect as parenting style.
Tubetoob on September 9th, 2010 03:17 pm (UTC)
People without kids are always such experts in how they ought to be raised.
Tube: cagetoob on September 9th, 2010 03:35 pm (UTC)
DAMN that was snarky. *gropes for his coffee*
Grauph. - yourbob on September 9th, 2010 04:07 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Grauph. - athelind on September 9th, 2010 04:15 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Grauph. - toob on September 9th, 2010 04:27 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Grauph. - notthebuddha on September 9th, 2010 07:20 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Tombfyretombfyre on September 9th, 2010 03:47 pm (UTC)
I've started to see some eating establishments banning children entirely, seeing as parents can't be bothered to raise the things properly. ^^() Kudos to them, for taking a stand and not just putting up with the noise anymore.
Your Obedient Serpent: coyote laughsathelind on September 9th, 2010 04:18 pm (UTC)
And if it ever comes down to a court case:

"You can't discriminate against parents with children."

"We'll start serving hard liquor."

"... a lot of places serve cocktails. That doesn't automatically make you a 21-and-up establishment."

"We'll bring in strippers."

Grauph. - tombfyre on September 9th, 2010 05:36 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Grauph. - hafoc on September 10th, 2010 02:33 am (UTC) (Expand)
Moonfire: sternmoonfires on September 9th, 2010 04:00 pm (UTC)
I've checked with the parental units on this, and gotten two pieces of information. First, there is such a thing as too young to be taken to a place of public accommodation, and both me and my brother were never taken "out" until we were old enough to behave. Second, we were taught there is a way to behave in public, and if you can't, you won't be in public. Parents don't even handle the "too young" right anymore. I see them feeding them at the table in the restaurants or not at all. According to my mother, the trick was to feed the baby before even leaving so if you had to bring them, they'd be out cold in food coma :D and have a bagel to shove into their mouth if they're teething.
Bobyourbob on September 9th, 2010 04:06 pm (UTC)
You don't have children, do you? Ever babysat? Ever, yourself, had a temper tantrum and become unreasonable?

I've seen far more irate and unreasonable or just loud and obnoxious adults than I have seen screaming children.
Your Obedient Serpent: barcodeathelind on September 9th, 2010 04:30 pm (UTC)
*DEEEEEP breath* I'm going to try to say this without spewing bitterness:

The fact that I am no longer serving in loco parentis is one of the few positive things to come out of my impending divorce.
Grauph. - gatewalker on September 9th, 2010 08:32 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Grauph. - hitchkitty on September 9th, 2010 10:19 pm (UTC) (Expand)
A.R.M.: Slappykinkyturtle on September 10th, 2010 03:35 am (UTC)
You dare to impugn the Holy Screaming of our All-Important Lord and Master, the Small Child?! Blasphemer!

(Seriously, what is with the snarky and critical comments you're getting? I agree with you that a restaurant untainted by the screams of small children is both possible and desirable.)
McGuffinhitchkitty on September 10th, 2010 08:08 am (UTC)
Well, y'know, people who don't repair cars for a living aren't entitled to criticize a repair job that leaves the brakes completely inoperable. Just like people who aren't doctors aren't allowed to condemn a physician whose patients leave sicker than they arrived.
Grauph. - kinkyturtle on September 10th, 2010 09:11 am (UTC) (Expand)