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04 April 2011 @ 11:25 pm
JobQuest: Coda  
I am not a scientist.

I am not in a job where I am doing science, particularly not the kind of ecological sciences that I thought was my calling.

For years, for decades, I had I Am A Scientist, and if I am not Doing Science, I am Wasting My Life carved on my soul.

And because of that, I wasted my life.

But you know what?

I Got Over Myself.

I Am Not A Scientist. I Am Not Doing Science.

And I am finally Doing Something With My Life, because I have let that go.

I am in a position to make good use of my skills and experience. I am in a position to do some good with the second half of my life.

Hell, that's right there at the top of my resume:

Coast Guard veteran with degrees in Earth Systems Science and Biotechnology seeks a position that will integrate his education and experience, to make positive change in the world.

I am there. I've got that.

And it's not at all the job I saw for myself. It's not the job I was expecting.

Life surprised me.

And Life is Good.

Allow yourself the possibility of surprise.

Edit: On reading this the next morning, I realize I didn't clearly state something very important:

I Am Not A Scientist. I Am Not Doing Science.

I am not "following my dream"—but I love my job.

I haven't "settled". This is not "disappointment".

I am in a job that leaves me engaged, fulfilled and, at the end of more days than not, happy.

Life surprised me, and Life is Good.
ArchTeryxarchteryx on April 5th, 2011 01:08 pm (UTC)
Well, I'm about to join you in this "not a scientist" bit, it looks like. I'm certainly pounding hard on alternatives.

Eclipseeclipsegryph on April 5th, 2011 03:47 pm (UTC)
"I am in a job that leaves me engaged, fulfilled and, at the end of more days than not, happy."

That is always great to hear/read. XD
Your Obedient Serpentathelind on April 6th, 2011 04:02 am (UTC)
Of course, if I'd Gotten Over Myself in 1990 or so, I'd still be in the Coast Guard, with a couple of decades of "engaged, fulfilled, and happy" under my belt.

Unless I'd retired at 20 years instead of 30.
Arcaton: jackassr_caton on April 5th, 2011 03:59 pm (UTC)
Life is Good, indeed.
Me Engineer
Me mainly chat with customers on phone, do social work like as not...
but I make people happy, the company I work for makes people happy (on the whole) and I love my job, too.

It's a good feeling.

Almost makes up for the bastard 25 mile drive across London every day.....
Terminotaur: Science 1terminotaur on April 5th, 2011 04:30 pm (UTC)
Its weird for me. When I finally let go of needing that to define me, and relaxed, enjoyed what I was doing (though it was as a technician), that was when I ended up getting the best shot at being a scientist. :)

I don't know if I really can define myself now. I still think of myself more as a technician. Maybe its best not to really put too much into the definitions because then there's the chance for things to surprise you, or in some cases create new definitions.
(Deleted comment)
Wywy on June 18th, 2011 01:15 am (UTC)
I think I got the other half of the coin flip, Aeth. Doing science *for* the Coast Guard.

And I think I love it too.